Itapos;s been awhile since I last post anything here. Nothing much happens, just that I�am feeling a total different thing from what I expected. I can feel the distance from my so called "cliques". Somehow, I�just canapos;t bring forward myself to talk to them. Or to put it in a simple manner, I am tired of being the one taking initiative to talk, to entertain, to smile, to do silly things. I am always the one who are doing all these things, and this is so not me in the first place. I�am tired of being a different me, an entertainer? Thatapos;s not me.
But in their eyes? Maybe I�am just trying to seek some -i do not need- attention. Seriously, why would I�need your attention? Maybe in the past, I�need attention, but then as time past by, I�realise I�do not need it anymore. In fact, I will be more happy if nobody come and disturb me.
Smile more? they didnapos;t know how much effort Iapos;ve put in to maintain this relationship. They donapos;t know. Itapos;s never easy to smile...NEVER... I�seriously am tired of all these idiotic stuff...
and I felt cheated. I dunoe if u meant it, but it seems that it appears the other way round. Iapos;d rather choose to believe that I misinterprete the whole thing...and i chose to believe so...to make myself feel better and to make myself dislike u less. I simply feel like a fool, everything changed...all changed...itapos;s never the same anymore.
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